It’s been a week since I’ve eradicated you from my life and I just can’t stop thinking about you. I know we’re taking a break but I decided to write you a letter explaining how I truly feel.
Look. I miss you. As much as I want to hate you, I’d be lying to you and myself by saying that I don’t miss you. I mean, I can’t say we didn’t have good times together… I miss looking at your beautiful features. God! It’s been at least 4 years that you’re in my life, daily. I long to touch you once again. I want to fall asleep looking at you and wake up with you. I want to scroll through your feed and double-tap on all the cool things you show me. I want to feel you against the palm of my hand, knowing I am you and you are me. But, I digress.
Oh, Instagram. Even when I reminisce, I am reminded of all the reasons we called it quits. You have to know, this is difficult for me to say but, I am happier without you. To be honest, it’s not you, it’s me! Maybe it’s just the way I am, the way my brain functions but you make me miserable. I don’t like the person I become when I spend time with you… Everytime I look at you, I compare myself to others. It drives me crazy. You make me feel ungrateful for the things I have and constantly yearn for more. Sometimes in the middle of the night, I get this urge, this need to look at you, even if it’s just for a quick second. When I’m not checking you, I feel like I’m missing out. I mean, deep inside I know that the things you show me, they aren’t real. They’re carefully curated and glamorized. They’re what others want me to see. But it still hits a nerve, deep down. My conversations now are real. I don’t have to slide into anyone’s DMs. Now when I eat food, I appreciate it’s content over how photogenic it is. To be completely honest, you’re like a drug and I just don’t think our relationship is healthy.
I hope one day, I’ll look back and think: you made the right decision. I can’t tell you how hard it is to say goodbye, but I truly think it’s for the best.
Yours truthfully,
S
